the power of music

I realized that for the most part we listened exclusively to holiday music for the last month and a half. We watched very little TV and if we did it was a movie about the holiday's which most always included various Christmas songs. My two year old has run around singing carols and although she doesn't always get the lyrics correct, she does get the tune right. The songs make her sing, dance, and smile and it's hard not to follow her lead.

So now that the Holiday season is taking it's leave, my husband and I have taken it upon ourselves to introduce our daughter to a variety of music. We have decided that during the day we will limit our TV watching and instead play music. Music that has had an impact on our lives or emotions in some way. And in turn it will hopefully inspire her to love music the way we do.

My parents were always music lovers. I can remember afternoons and weekends filled with around the house projects and always in the background was music. Supertramp, James Taylor, Enya, Celine Dion, Spyro Gyro, Sheryl Crow,...and on. Some of my favorite childhood memories include dinner on the patio while listening to something my parents put on. It was a happy time in all of our lives and the music was the reflecting soundtrack.

Now that we have all grown up music still plays an important but more silent role in our lives. We have moved on, taken on new responsibilities such as jobs, kids, mortgages, and so on. Music has been forgotten from time to time. But not anymore.

We realized as a family that our current situation (location and finances) is less than ideal but maybe we can still turn this trying time into something more positive with music. If not for us than maybe for our daughter. Hopefully she can look back, as I do, and remember how happy she was painting and dancing with mom or planting and singing with dad. It will be our catalyst into happiness and creativity. Maybe it will help us get some home improvement projects done too!

the plan

I've always known I was not a city girl, but I'm finding more and more that even the busy suburbs of Phoenix aren't my cup of tea either. The weather is beautiful here most of the year and it was worth the experience of moving and discovering a new place but my husband and I both miss the color green. We ache for rainy days. Every day here in AZ is so beautiful you feel guilty about not getting out. And I'm not big on getting out.



I'm a homebody. I enjoy being at home. I love crocheting an afghan or watching a movie with my daughter. I like staying home and baking cookies and I prefer staying in my comfy clothes for the entire day. I remember Barbara Streisand once saying she prefers to stay home. That's me. I prefer to stay home. Call me Babs.

A simple life is the plan. One that doesn't require keeping with any type of jones'. A heavily wooded 5 acres with a beautiful house. A place we can have chickens and sheep. A place our kids can have adventures without the fear of the ball rolling in the street. A place we let ourselves get snowed in. A place for many vegtable gardens. A place for a tire swing and tree forts. A place for hot chocolate and quilting. A place we can live our dreams.

The great part is we found our destination. We just need to pave the path to get there. And we will do this as a family.

finding a marriage

It's no secret my husband and I don't get along from time to time. We probably quarrel more than most and a great majority of those arguments stem from frustration, finances, and the loneliness that accompanies a newly married couple who moves 2000 miles away from home, family and friends for the first time. This last year has been an eye opener on who we really are as individuals and as a family.

When it comes to being a family and making family decisions we are incredibly in sync. That is if we make the decision together. We are project people. We get along famously when we are concentrating on a single result together and the result always exceeds our expectations.
Whether it be making chili, decorating a room, or getting through a road trip with a two year old and one year old black lab we come together and complete the project with laughter and love and memories to spare.

As individuals we are well aware of what makes us different. But over the ten years we have been together some of the qualities that set us apart have been left by the wayside to make room for the things we thought would make us the same. I think many couples do this when first starting out. For us, the things we left behind are now the things that will bring us back together. I don't think many people get to say that.

Somehow, through a recent road trip, financial struggle, and preparing our house for the addition of another child, we have started the dialogue of planning for our future. And our visions, for the first time, are the same. We want the same things for our family and for us as individuals. It's not just a goal or where we see ourselves in a year. It's what we want ultimately and it's quickly becoming the light at the end of our tunnel here in AZ.

Now, it doesn't mean an end to all arguments but it is an end to uncertainty. And it's one very long project to work on together. And that makes me very happy.

..more to come on our plans!

Excuse me, Fall? Phoenix is calling you.

I am ready for fall. I am ready for fall candles and decorations. I am ready for cooler weather, sweatshirts and jeans. I am ready for cuddling up under blankets with hot mugs of tea. I am ready to open the windows and let the fresh air fill our house. I am ready for fall.
It seems, however, that fall is not ready for me. Phoenix is no place to be ready for fall. There are no leaves to change color and no cooler weather to be had. The end of October average temperature is still in the mid 80's. What is a girl to do?

Things I Love

-biscotti
-cucumber water
-when molly tells me, "i so happy mama"
-thunderstorms
-decorating my house
-when all my bills are paid for the month
-reading
-kissing my husband
-spring fever perfume from origins
-jacob's creek shiraz
-fall
-green

Another Day, Another Angry Dollar

I'm not a people person.

At all.

Most everyone who has met me realizes this sooner than later. It will be seven years in October that i have worked for an "internationally known coffee house" and i'm telling you right now....my days are numbered.

Seriously, if I have to listen to people complain about things that are trivial, not to mention fixable, for another seven years I might have to hang myself with my green apron during a rush.

Ok, that was a little overdramatic, but you get my point.

I'm giving myself another year.

At the most.

In one year I could have all my debts paid off and maybe even a little of my husband's too if he's nice to me.

I could go back to school

I could travel

I could become a buddhist and find enlightenment

I might not do any of this,

but I also wouldn't have to clean up after people I don't know.

And I wouldn't have to greet people thirty seconds after they walk in the door.

Well, i might still do that one.

It would be a little awkward to let someone in my house without talking to them.

No one will care if there are fingerprints on my glass door or if my oven is slightly dirty.

So obviously i have given all this alot of thought and here is what I have come up with.

I will serve my time for the greater good over the next year so that I can be free and clear of all debts.

I will save a little extra money to book myself, and maybe my husband, a one week vacation to Hawaii where we will do absolutely nothing!

Kind of a farewell parting gift to myself.

Is it next year yet?

Change in Plans

My August trip to Florida is postponed until a much later date. So the ocean and I will not be together anytime soon and I'm okay with that. Surprised? Me too! This whole moving thing has really taken a toll on me. I find myself having bad days and some good ones too, but the bad ones have been creeping up in numbers lately. I finally bit the bullet a couple of weeks ago and made an appointment with a counselor and a follow up appointment with a doctor for some good drugs! The combination of them both is wonderful. I have a purpose thanks to my counselor (who will hereby be known as 'life coach') and am in a cloud of happiness thanks to a temporary wonder drug prescribed by the doctor. Who knew things could turn around so quickly!?? There is one downfall though, if i take wonderdrug too late i'm completely drowsy the next day. I'm still working on the timing. Things could be worse.

Anywho, I decorated my downstairs bathroom using items I already had around the house. It was getting to the point where I would go all the way upstairs to use the restroom(that's how much I hated the decor). I'm off to home goods today to find a mirror and two picture frames. I would ultimately like to change the fixtures (faucet, lighting, and such) but this will have to do till a little money rolls in. I'm super proud of the bathroom. I even got out the caulk gun thingy and fixed the cracks around the sink and toilet. Go me! I'll take a picture as soon as I find the couple of missing items.

I have a plan for the rest of the house too. Over the next year I plan to dedicate most of my time to getting the inside of this giant house decorated. I'm looking forward to being in a comfortable house where I am surrounded by things I love! To look at all this empty space day after day is a bit annoying. It's like not paying your bills on time. The house nags me I swear!

I'm also looking into finishing school while we are out here in AZ. I'm thinking of a degree in education. I would also like to take a couple photography classes. I need a hobby, badly!

I will continue to post progress on the house but for now I hear little Molly calling. Have a great weekend! Talk to you next week!

The Sea and Me

I don't care for being land locked.

Deep in my heart I know I am meant to live by a large body of water somewhere. There's something exciting, scary, romantic, etc. about the ocean.

Depending on your own mood to start with, it can bring about a whole new outlook and set of feelings.

I love that.

I love being able to wake up each morning by the sea and feel something new.

I love that the waters change.


Is it windy, storming, high tide?

The waters change with each change of the weather.

That is me.

I change with the weather. I change with the moon.

I can be harsh and choppy or calm and inviting, all within hours.

I like not knowing. I live for the suprise of emotion.

It's been over three years since the last time I have sat near the ocean.

And when we are finally together again in August it will be as no time has passed.

It will not wonder where I have been.

It will not depress me with it's problems, nor will I do the same with mine.

I will simply sit and take in my fill of it's beauty.

dreams

I turn 27 next month. No, that's not old and i'm not complaining but it's got me thinking. There are so many things I've wanted to do in my life that I haven't and i'm wondering if i ever will at this point.



I want to go on safari in Africa.



Sip espresso at a cafe in Italy.



Drink a glass of wine at an outdoor bistro in France.



Gaze at the pyramids in Egypt.



Learn photography.



Own a pottery wheel.



Find a career....and so many others.



It seems now that my world is taking care of one child, planning for another and trying to stay ahead of the always impending financial debt that i won't be doing any of these things anytime soon.



I never understood why 'adults' said to enjoy your youth. Well, now I understand. Responsibility. On a brighter note I am a good wife and mother. I would never run away from the life I have created. But a vacation would be nice.

Toto, I've got a feeling we're not in Illinois anymore

My husband, daughter, and I have recently created a new chapter in our book of life. We have left the familiarity of Chicago and moved across our beautiful country to Phoenix, AZ. We moved here in October and over the past six months the initial excitment of owning our own home and exploring the new surroundings has almost completely worn off. I now know where everything important to me is, the grocery store, target, the fashion mall, local pizza place, a chinese restaraunt that delivers, and the liquor store. If my bank account was larger (i'm only working part time after the move to save on day care) I would venture out a little more, but alas, it's not and since i haven't created my million dollar idea yet i'm stuck entertaining myself and our two year old. Now that is an adventure all on it's own! Wish me luck!